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What Does Homeschooling Have to Do with Salad?

We were recently driving in the car talking about what was on the dinner menu for that evening. Our oldest daughter gets so upset with her brother when he calls his carrots, cucumbers, and croutons (all separate and ready to dip), a salad.

This spurred a conversation about what “salad” actually is. My first words were in reference to salad being a bunch of vegetables mixed together. Huh? Then I moved to needing lettuce in the mix, with Chloe adding things like cucumbers, carrots, radishes, and broccoli. Jayden proceeded to say you could put bananas on a salad, which we all pointed out would make “Fruit Salad” (Yummy, Yummy). Jayden’s final and ultimate thought on the discussion was that, “You can put anything on salad that you want.” What do you prefer in your salad?

This lead me to thinking about how we define things, and what happens when we try to define things that don’t seem to have a clear definition. That is how I got from salad, to homeschooling.

I find homeschooling to be one of those terms which lacks a clear definition. It is a broad large term, encompassing many different looks and variations. Dictionary.com defines it as, “to teach (one’s children) at home instead of sending them to school”. Even to say that homeschooling is school at home (which uses the literal combination of the words), does not accurately define nor encompass all that homeschooling has come to be an umbrella for. When talking to my husband about this he said, “No, homeschooling is more like school that is conducted outside of a traditional public or private school!”

We so often get raised eyebrows and blanketed stereotypical questions like, “What about socialization?” when people find out we are homeschoolers. I often wonder what they are picturing in their heads when they do this. Homeschooling, like salad, is different for each and every family. I could say we are a more school at home family, and our day would still vary completely from another family who feels they are also a school at home family. Even if you are using the same curriculum, you will inevitably use it in a different way than the “Jones” family down the street.

In our area we are part of an unschooling group where I often find this ambiguous definition conundrum, to come into play. What exactly is unschooling? Here are a couple of viewpoints:

– a term that the late John Holt coined in the late ‘70′s to describe learning that is based on a child’s interests and needs
– also known as interest driven, child-led, natural, organic, eclectic, or self-directed learning
– allowing children as much freedom to learn in the world, as their parents can comfortably bear
– lacking in schooling; “untaught people whose verbal skills are grossly deficient”

I am sure I could go on forever about the discrepancies in defining this unique thing we call homeschooling. Instead I would propose that we all stop trying to define, and just accept. You are not like me, and I am not like you. That doesn’t make you right, and me wrong, or vice versa. It means that I like tomatoes, and cucumbers in what I call a salad, and you like dressing, and olives in what you call a salad. So….

You say eether and I say eyether,
You say neether and I say nyther,
Eether, eyether, neether, nyther,
Let’s call the whole thing off!

You like potato and I like potahto,
You like tomato and I like tomahto,
Potato, potahto, tomato, tomahto!
Let’s call the whole thing off!

But oh! If we call the whole thing off,
Then we must part.
And oh! If we ever part,
Then that might break my heart!

So, if you like pajamas and I like pajahmas,
I’ll wear pajamas and give up pajahmas.
For we know we need each other,
So we better call the calling off off.
Let’s call the whole thing off!

My point in all of this is that we can be homeschoolers and not look anything like people perceive us to be. It is a pretty good bet that we won’t look like the homeschoolers we bump shoulders with either. Homeschooling, like salad, is a broad term, left open for options and interpretation. I hope one day the world can see homeschooling, even public or private schooling, like a salad bar. We all come there to eat (or learn in the case of schooling), we all fill our plates with different things (or knowledge and a means of getting there in the case of schooling), and we all leave talking about this same great salad bar we each ate at (or learned at in the case of schooling), in our own unique style.

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4 Comments

  1. This is so true. Within my family we have three sisters that homeschool, each in our own way. We all found our path to choosing to homeschool in its own way. I think our common link is the fact that we wanted to have our children receive a great education. One of my sisters has a child that is dyslexic, I do too and even with that commonality we still tackle this task differently. Ironically I think it because I am dyslexic and see it more as a “different” way of learning rather than how sis does, as a “challenged” way of learning. I do not think her way is wrong, it is just how she is wired and she is giving her all in teaching her daughter to read. She has consulted several people who are dyslexic, so she can better understand what is going on with her child, as well as having a friend come over and tutor my niece in reading. I live with dyslexia everyday so It was more of a shock to teach my son that is not dyslexic. LOL. I called her and told how easy this reading stuff is, and she whined that is was not really so easy! We wear “PJ’s”, she wears “Jammas”

    1. KB, I love that you can have your own way of viewing/doing something, and still recognize how your sister comes from a different perspective, which doesn’t make her wrong. I think so often we are quick to see different, and think wrong. In general I feel people choose their own path, with good intentions, and with a goal of doing what is best for themselves and their family.

  2. Excellent post! It is so true – no two families are the same. Interestingly enough, not even the same family remains the same over time. No two public school families are the same either. That is what makes the world unique and beautiful. I tell my kids all the time – if we all were good at the same things and did the same things – life would be boring. The salad analogy is cute!!

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