Every day, week, month and year we are all around others who do not homeschool. I admit it…I did not homeschool from the beginning. We talked about it…but, then, fear set in. That question of “Can I really do this? Do I really have what it takes?” A few of my friends were homeschooling, but for the most part, a majority sent their children to school.
This was our way of life. Until, we decided to take our daughter out after Kindergarten. We decided to bring her home….purchased the curriculum and then…I put her back on the bus! Yep…I sure did. I had so many people telling me she’d be ok, their kids went to school, she would miss out….and there was NO way I could handle homeschool…after all, what would I do with our (then) three year old. How could I handle both of them…and our oldest’s schedule in public school. Not to mention the fact, a couple of people I knew who had decided to homeschool…had decided not to….for many of the same reasons….. So, I sent her back. For a full week…..I sent her back…and from the very first day, I remembered why I did it and I realized…I had been listening to others, not the voice of truth that was speaking to me. So, she did not go back after that first week…and 8 weeks later, our oldest son came home.
Our days are filled with laughter…and well, you know, other sounds that accompany children in life. We can choose to dwell on the ‘not-so-good’ or push forward through encouragement and lift each other up! The not-so-good days…are well..even worse without a community of families that come together to encourage….and that is what we want to do, here!
We all homeschool for different reasons. Yet, here at the Hip Homeschool Moms, we come together and encourage others through those good and well…the not-s0-good days.
How did you make the decision to homeschool? Did you always know you would homeschool?
Did you start to…then….decide not to…only to come back to homeschooling? Share your stories here with us!
Leave a comment…tell others and share some encouragement.
Rebecca is a Hip Homeschool Moms Senior Team Member and blogs at Mom’s Mustard Seeds
Oh man, We started our very first day of homeschool EVER this week with a pre-schooler. I also have a 2 year old. After an hour the first day, I was in tears. My daughter was SO EXCITED that she just wanted to do everything and do it quickly and NOW. My 2 year old was not happy with the activities I had for him — he just wanted to go play with his sister! It was awful. But today was better. And this is why I started a year before I really want her to actually learn anything. So I could be frustrated without any “pressure” of making sure we’re hitting milestones. I’m absolutely determined that I am the best teacher for my kids and I am determined NOT to let little failures and bad days ruin that determination. I hope!
Can I be your new best friend?
I am starting prek homeschooling next week with my 3 year old… starting early (and easy) just like you to make sure there’s no huge pressure while I get the hang of it. It’s so reassuring to hear of people homeschooling preschoolers. I don’t know of anyone who’s home schooling, so this is going to be a huge journey for me.
I think we all have those days. Have you read any books on homeschooling? The ones for you, Mom…not how to…but…the ones that help you relax. Remember, you’ve already been teaching your children…now, just add some more crazyons, color pencils, paint, glue…and fun/giggles.
I thought about it for a long time. I should have done it years ago, but the thought, “I could NEVER do that!” prevented me from moving forward. This year, I brought home a 6th grader, 3rd grader and Kindergartener. There have been some rough patches. Before we even started, excitement turned to fear (in all of us). My 6th grader began to hear about middle school and begged…”MOM! You’re making me miss all my opportunities!!!” My 3rd grader, the social butterfly, began to opine, “Mom! All my FRIENDS will be at SCHOOL! I just wanna go be with THEM!” Then I began to wonder if I WAS making them miss out.. on being in band or orchestra, on going to the “big” school, on taking GT classes, on “socialization”
… But I was reminded that God called me to bring these children home, to bring our family closer, to BE the ONE influencing my children the most hours of the day, and so we did it anyway. Despite the protests of children who were going to miss their friends and “fabulous” opportunities; despite the questions and judgemental eye rolls of well-meaning family members; despite my own doubts… We DID it. The first week was pretty much a disaster. My 5yr old came down with a variety of illnesses spanning from strep to pneumonia. My older two started a one-day-a-week program through our local homeschool group, and immediately fell behind in their work, as I was off to Drs. appointments, etc. and didn’t follow up with keeping them on task. But, in spite of all that, we were together. We were doing LIFE TOGETHER. We prayed for a sick sibling’s health, TOGETHER. We got frustrated TOGETHER. We met new friends TOGETHER. And I know that this is where God wants our family to be: TOGETHER. So we will plow through, give each other a lot of grace, and enjoy this homeschool journey, wherever it leads us, TOGETHER.
What a beautiful story….the days that are rough…are rough, no doubt about it. I can’t imagine trying to transition those grades…it was tough enough for my two…even though, I think they wre tired of the stuff they were ‘going to miss’…but, there are things they miss. But, I think you’re absolutely right…you’re doing it TOGETHER! I am so sorry for your little one’s illness! My prayers are with you!
I happen to belong to a church, in which has a high population of homeschooling families. I never knew it even existed, show my naiv’e ….Well Anyways, my stepdaughter who is 16 and going into high school as a Junior and is in special ed, she is holding her own… Our son JAKE, I was sick in the gut for 2 weeks prior, crying in my dreams, over and over… I would wake up and say they are going to LOSE him,, My hubby , telling me its ok and that I am having a hard time letting him go… I explained over and over– I have that Sick -GUT- Mommy – feeling and I just knew…. Long story short, on the third day of school THEY (the school) loses my son.. My Jake who is learning disabled, has very limited speech was left in the Auditorium in the pitch black with the Doors locked and closed… They had no idea he was there and no onw did a head count to get him on the bus…. My beautiful boy,,,,,,So at that time I inisted they transfer him and they hes put into a “special ed” class room with behavioral issues… I knew something had to change…. I think I read every Homeschool book, I could get my hands, and research, research…
I went to my husband with HOMESCHOOLING option, explaining all that I have learned and that I have the support of a local group and church family… So this past Jan 2011, we started and he LOVES it… Now I have his lil sister who is going into 1st this yr, very bright and not sure what we are going to do in the long run, for now- school, but we will see…
OH, I am so sorry about that! HOW HORRIBLE! So glad to hear that your son is enjoying being home with you!!!
Thank you Rebecca, but it was meant to be…God allowed it to happen, so we could make the right decision for him.. He is so happy and has come out of his shell, all his anxieties are gone… Now my lil one, she is going into 1st and I am still on the fence about her education. She will be entering the local school but I have a feeling its matter of time…
No Parent or child should ever go through what we have with my son…
I knew I would homeschool the day my oldest started losing his love for reading and learning in general. He was only in 1st grade!! So I did the research, my husband and I talked it over and so here we are in our first month of homeschooling and so far so good. My son is now interested in “reading another chapter” to find out what happens. He loves that if he wants to learn more about a particular subject we can concentrate on that. I am also doing Pre-K with my 4 year old. We are taking it all one day at a time and I am so glad my husband and I made the decision to homeschool.
It’s interesting…to see how some children have the joy of learning taken away from them in an environment that should be enriching that desire! What a blessing…to your son…for you and your husband to make that choice!
It’s entirely my entire wife’s fault. I know neither when nor where she learned about homeschooling, but I was teaching professionally when she first mentioned it. I thought she was crazy. We had the same discussions with the same concerns and the same fears that many homeschoolers have when they wrestle with the decision of whether or not to teach their children at home. Ultimately, I applied the same rationale to our decision to homeschool that I apply to home improvement projects. There’s nothing I can do to my house that I cannot hire a professional to fix. I’ve never had to hire a professional to fix any of my home repairs, and they have been extensive. In 8 years (and I have been the primary teacher for all of them), I’ve never had to hire a professional to teach my children. The fears we experienced were a sign of how seriously we took the decision. Those fears reflected the love and concern we had for our children. But they also masked our God given talents and abilities that have made our homeschool as successful as it has been, once we decided to give ourselves a chance. So, take a chance on yourself. You just might find an incredible teacher inside of you.
Arby, that was a comment that brought tears to my eyes…I love the way you started it with blaming your wife and brought it full circle! What a blessing you are to her…and she is to you! I bet your home is one filled with laughter!
My oldest started Kindergarten in public schools…GREAT year; great leadership, great teacher, great mission. Very next year they took the principal out and replaced him w a lady w SERIOUS deficiencies in leadership, loyalty and INTEGRITY:(. Not just in the school but personally, too. This brought about a lack of morale, integrity and dog eat dog atmosphere. I’m from a close neighborhood in rural Ohio, I now raise our family I Phoenix, Arizona. I took my girls out of public after their 3rd and 1st years of public, then put them in a Lutheran private school. Were I paid good money so that my 2nd grader (who was too afraid to tell me) got bullied by her very own teacher. I’m a disabled vet, yet, my mind, love and devotion to my family remain strong. I said I want to KNOW exactly what is going into the soup…the old too many cooks can ruin the BEST recipe adage. So, my girls are schooled by my husband, myself and life, since the beginning of last year. I feel SOOO GOOD now. I feel fulfilled, and that my kids are FINALLY getting a DRAMA FREE education, they can THROW themselves into…WITHOUT DISTRACTIONS, JEALOUS/INSECURE/UNLOVED ppl trying to tear them down. I’ve rebuilt them w patience, love and proper guidance. It’s NOT ALWAYS easy… BUT IT IS WORTH IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I love your reply.
That is beautiful! Yes, at home.. distractions at school are diminished! Thank you for serving our country through the military and now…through homeschooling your children!
I am new to this as well……I have a 2 yr old and 8 mo old, and kept my daughter from starting kindergarten, and made the decision to keep my son home the very day he was supposed to start 7th grade! ‘he begged for weeks, but I was afraid
I would fail. Then I talked to some really encouraging homeschoolers, had curriculum handed to me, and thought, “Okay, God, I get it……I will keep him home!” First week is going well. He is blowing the review stuff away in the first of the book. I really feel like my only challenge with him, is that I will have a hard time challenging him! This is going to be great for all of us!
You have a full home…that is going to be very blessed by your decision. Remember to call on your friends during the tough days/moments for encouragement!
We always knew that we would homeschool – from the moment that we found out that we were pregnant (actually before then.) Both my brother & sister were homeschooled so it seemed very natural for us. But, the biggest mistake we ever made was putting that sweet daughter into a private school for 1st grade. We were trying to get out of debt, and she had a scholarship, so we did it so that I could work. It was NOT worth it! Because I had taught her for K, she was miles ahead and was bored out of her mind. She also had some very bad experiences that we’ve had to get over since then. The second mistake was making her finish that year because “we finish what we start.” So, one horrific year at regular school and homeschooling ever since.
Now she’s in 7th grade and my son is in 5th and they do amazing at home. We play together – and they learn with such enthusiasm and joy that I can’t imagine ever wanting to send them away again.
Recent Post:Do Field Trips to McDonalds Count?
I heard something a long time ago…when I was working: An error doesnt’ become a mistake until you refuse to correct it” (Orlando A Battista)….sounds to me like you corrected what you needed to for your family!!!!
Rebecca, that’s a fantastic way of thinking about it – thank you for the encouragement!
First of all, I’m loving reading all the responses! Everyone shares the same fears and concerns, and what Arby said: “…our fears reflected the love and concern we had for our children”…thank you for that reassurance! We have just begun our 2nd year of homeschooling and we could not be happier. My 2 daughters are 3rd grade and 6th grade. My older girl is the main reason we pulled out of public. For 2 years, she experienced being an outsider, a victim of “mean girl” mentality and isolation. She would occasionally bring up the idea of me homeschooling her, and even though what was happening broke my heart, I just didn’t feel qualified or even adequate. In the summer months, she always blossomed. Was easy going and loved family time. As back-to-school time approached, she withdrew again and my husband and I just knew in our hearts it was time. Time to care more about the precious condition of her heart and level of self-confidence than her head-knowledge. (Thankfully, teaching her and my other daughter has come very smoothly and they are both sailing along, almost a grade ahead now!) Numerous friends and family members have commented on how much happier my sweet girl is now. That blesses my heart and gives me the determination to keep going. As another poster said…doing LIFE TOGETHER…it’s precious time and we only get one shot at it!
I love the way your heart changed and through that it has blessed your daughter…you will always look back on this and smile, knowing….that she will always carry that with her! What a blessing! Thank you for sharing!
Thank you Rebecca,
I agree, but other than that, life is sweet!
Yes, our whole family has been blessed by our decision. Even though we are together all day, we have found that it makes us want to do more free-time things together too. It’s like when they were in public school, I hardly knew them. We would spread out in the evenings, barely communicating. Now, I truly KNOW and love their personalities…we’re learning each others’ love languages and have bonded in a huge way! My husband says the only thing he doesn’t like about the idea of h.schooling is that he can’t be home during the day to learn with us.
I wanted to homeschool from the start — but in my first marriage – he was much against homeschooling, and no one we knew homeschooled – Plus I had to work so I found a job in a preschool so I would be at same school as her at least. It was fine thru first grade as I worked hard to keep her in private christian school. summer before 2nd grade I lost funding and she went to public school. During beginning of this school year my daughter and I faced so much! My husband (her daddy) walked out on us just left! I lost my job and my daughter would cry when she had to go to school. she did have a wonderful teacher! So convinced I could never homeschool I would put her on the bus sad every morning, Then I would go inside and cry. One year from the up set I met an amazing christian man that stole my heart. He loves my daughter as his own and we have been together ever since! Half way thru 3rd grade he encouraged me to pull her from school! February 2011 was the start of our journey! The Lord blessed us! We found an apartment (NICE 1) close to his job. Because we moved we also found a local homeschool group with TONS of support and children! It was a long rough journey — BUT WE MADE IT! And everyday is not easy but everyday is ours. She doesnt cry any more – she loves to read again, she wants to learn!
The journey through the storm must have been so incredibly difficult. What a blessing, to come out on the other end and have your prayers/dreams answered!! Thank you for sharing that with us!!!
When I was pregnant with my oldest child I realized that my problem with getting up early in the morning was going to cause problems for his school attendance in the years to come. So I started looking into homeschooling because then we could start school on OUR time. Of course all of my children are early morning people and up way before me every day of the week. But over the years there are so many reasons outside of the early mornings now that we are choosing to home school. I started working with Kayd on preschool stuff three years ago. We did a loose and fun preschool for two years, a loose and fun kindergarten last year, and are now solidly into our third week of 1st grade. We all LOVE homeschooling. I LOVE teaching and being able to teach my own children on my own terms is an amazing blessing. I’ve certainly had my moments of doubt about whether I’d totally screw them up by somehow neglecting to teach them something important but I solved that by purchasing curriculum that tells me exactly what to teach and when and I feel much more confident in what we’re doing than I ever thought I would. Now my 4 and 2.5yr old are benefiting from some loose and fun preschool stuff while I do 1st grade with my almost 6yr old and our baby girl sleeps. I can’t imagine my life any other way.
Yeah! What a great comment…and a way to help make those morning easier!!!
I decided to homeschool (starting next week) at two separate times. The first epiphany came when I started my gig as a nanny and the 6-year-old I worked with was being taught the most bizarre reading technique… the exact same reading technique that my little brother (8 years her senior living in a completely different school district) learned. I am a HUGE reader and the fact that every 5 and 6 year old that I have come across in the past 8 years or so doesn’t know phonetics just completely blew my mind… But that’s another rant for another day. After reading up on it, my feelings on teaching my daughter were validated when I learned that 5-year-olds are simply ill-equipped to handle a heavily regimented routine that the public school system enforces. So I decided to homeschool through first grade to get her on a good path.
For whatever reason, I assumed that I would send my daughter off on her happy way to PreK and then bring her home for kindergarten… until I started researching PreK’s… And I came across a blog post that compared different philosophies – one of which was Charlotte Mason. I was sold almost immediately. So my daughter will be starting a Charlotte Mason-esque preschool with me next week two days a week to start (she is only 3 after all). As for her later education, I’d like to think I can handle it but I’m really considering a Sudbury Education after the age of 10 or so to get her acclimated to learning on her own and interacting with all different ages and working together with people outside the family.
What a blessing! Yes, my daughter…missed out on learning phonics well….we are still back-tracking…but, making progress.
My husband is a public school educator, serving the Lord as a band director in high school. In addition to all that he sees on a daily basis, we were both bullied as students. That gives us a strong distaste for the public school environment.
We always knew we would homeschool but did not think our homeschool journey would begin until our children reached middle school. Our oldest child attended a private preschool and public kindergarten. Shortly into the kindergarten year, we began to struggle with the special education teacher (our daughter has Autism) and we noticed strong behavior problems emerging as well as an increase in her self-stimulating behaviors. We felt that God was leading us to go ahead and pull her out of public school.
Her doctors expressed their disapproval. My inlaws were unsupportive. We were going against the strongest current possible… but God was paddling the boat.
Now, even her doctor agrees that it was the best decision possible. Her behavior is improved. She gets the one-on-one attention she needs.
It is not easy to homeschool a child with Autism, a child with ADHD and have two preschoolers underfoot. Some days I wonder what life would be like if my children went to public school and I had the house to myself. But, I rebuke that as a very selfish thought and refocus on the fact that my children are receiving the best education possible, suited to their individual needs. They would not get that anywhere else.
Sorry this got so long. I just feel strongly that if you and your spouse are on the same page and have prayed about it, the decision is already made. Go for it!
What a full load you have! Do you have friends you can call during those tough times? No worries on the long post…this is why we ask these questions. Moms need a place to voice their struggles and their triumphs…and who knows how many other families you might encourage by sharing them here… Thank you!!!!!!
I guess you could say that I am a codependent blogger. My blog is my support network. I express my trials when appropriate and have some amazing readers who encourage me or share their own struggles. I also love blogs like this were I can be reminded that I am not alone.
Always knew we would, just didn’t know exactly what it would all look like. We have 7 children and have been on “the journey” for 19 years now! EEEEEKKKK!! Still have four at home for school and it is looking like we still have several more years in front of us. It’s all good. Just remember: it’s a marathon, not a sprint. Don’t measure progress in small chunks of time. Think LONG term. All those tiny steps add up to LOTS of miles toward our goals.
WOW! 19 YEARS!!! You must have a ton of wisdom you can share with the rest of us!!! What is your biggest bit of advice for anyone thinking of starting…or just starting on the homeschool journey…or even those who are consdering sending their kids back for high school?
For those starting out, I learned the hard way that it’s best to put one “big piece” in place at a time. For example, if you are starting with very young ones, focus on getting them used to doing their reading time everyday to begin with. As that becomes “normal,” add in another piece, maybe math. If there is a particularly challenging area for your child, don’t add it to your new routine last, but don’t add it first. You want them to have plenty each day at which they feel successful, so that the whole day doesn’t feel so hard to them. As they “grow into” each new addition, add another, starting with small steps. It helps them, but it also helps new homeschooling moms to feel successful and not overwhelmed. Even if you are starting homeschooling with older children, the same principle can be quite helpful to ease everyone into this new lifestyle.
Our older three children went to a small classical Christian school after about 7th grade. The younger four are probably going to be here for the duration. Our situation is somewhat unique in that two of our younger four were adopted from Russia seven years ago, when they were 6 and 7. They are very challenged academically and so homeschooling is really important for them. When we sent our older three “to school,” I really wrestled with it, but our oldest is extremely gifted, our second struggles greatly with math and we had two baby girls. It seemed to be our best option at that point. Looking back, I’m not as sure.
When homeschooling is done with Grace and Love, but also very high standards, I don’t think there is another method that can even come close to bearing the fruit in young hearts and minds that it can. Parents are in the position of knowing their children best and also of wanting the best for them, more than anyone else ever will. The Lord is so very Faithful to come alongside us and fill it all with His Redemptive Nature so that the outcome is beyond anything we could accomplish on our own. Our family is absolute proof! Our children are so amazing!! And it’s ALL Him!!!
I could go on forever, sorry.
We brought the girls home last because my 3rd grader wanted to learn new stuff. She actually started talking about it in 2nd grade and we did a 10 day trial run. I put her back because my youngest daughter’s Kinder teacher had concerns about autism. She brought in the district autism specialist [Jon] whom we had worked for years with concerning my son [my oldest]. Jon said he wanted to see my youngest in 1st grade, so we left the girls in. Once Jon observed my youngest a couple times and said he had no autism concerns, my oldest renewed her chant of wanting to learn new stuff. We started the evaluation to bump her up a grade, but half way through decided to just bring the girls home. The reason we brought the girls home was only the tip of the iceberg; there are so many many reasons we now homeschool.
My son we brought home in 6th grade because he was so stressed by the middle school environment, he would throw up as soon as he got to school. FOr 4 months I freestyle homeschooled him, then we enrolled him in Connections Academy [an online public school]. He skipped to 8th grade and did well, and then we enrolled him in the local public school for high school. My son has ADHD and an IEP for Asperger’s, and has always struggled socially. Hubby and I felt he really needed the social opportunities of high school. He went 2 years and we’ve again transferred him into Connections Academy for his remaining 2 years of high school. The local high school’s academics were not preparing him for college and that’s his goal. So he’s had on public school-homeschool-public school-homeschool experience, but I wouldn’t change it. He got what he needed every step of the way.
Homeschool is not the easy path. It require that I stretch and grow and learn myself. For us homeschool is the path of greater peace and more family and less pressure/stress.
I love the way you have worked to find what works best for your family…and that you shared it with everyone here. Everyone needs to identify what is best for their family and each individual child! Thank you for sharing!
I grew up in both public and private (Christian) schools. And, after going through the Christian school, I knew I would *never* put my children in a “Christian” school. (There was much hypocrisy, game-playing, and “talking the talk,” but, it seemed to me, very few genuine, growing Christians.) MANY of my friends were homeschooled. But, I think I picked up on my parents’ (mostly my mom’s) negative view of homeschoolers/homeschooling – all of the typical stereotypes… And, again, I swore I would never “do that” to my child.
I entered (a Christian, liberal arts) college with the intent to become an elementary school teacher. After only a few weeks, switched my major to Biblical Studies (with an emphasis in Christian Education).
And, as I began to meet fellow students, and get to know them, I couldn’t tell the difference between the “odd, sheltered, unsocialized” homeschoolers, and the students who had gone to school (public or private). And, the homeschoolers weren’t as strange as I had once thought.
In several of my classes, the topic of homeschooling came up frequently (as many of the classes were centered on philosophies and methodologies of Christian education, and the homeschooling movement has played quite a large role in that over the past several decades). So, I decided to write my “undergraduate thesis” on homeschooling. Tons of research, and 35 single-spaced pages later…
I was convinced.
Now all that was left to do was convince my then-fiancee…
He was raised exclusively in public school, and really, held many of the same negative views of homeschoolers as I once did. But, as I prayed about it, and shared my research with him, and my growing conviction that this was the way we needed to educate our children (should the Lord bless us with them someday), he also changed his view! 
We will begin our second “official” year of homeschooling on Tuesday. Our daughter is 6, and is/will be in 1st grade. My husband is a pastor, so his “work schedule” is a little different from your typical 9-5 job. So, homeschooling has also offered us great flexibility to have “family time” when HE is available, and not just when a calendar (or school district) dictates.
I will say, last year was tough…for a number of reasons – not all related to homeschooling. But, we’ve made some (pretty big) changes this year, and I think they will contribute to a much better year. And, oddly enough, I am looking forward to the start of this year WAY more than I was last year!! 
Hello All
Here is a link to our answer “why do we homeschool?”:
http://traceymansted.blogspot.com/2011/04/why-do-we-homeschool.html
We are now in our 3rd year, and it is getting better and better…though some days you need some extra help to get through…
http://traceymansted.blogspot.com/2011/08/when-grumpy-rules-roost.html?utm_source=BP_recent
I think the first year is really hard work for the parent, but actually very affirming for the child.
My personal feeling is that homeschool is best for every kid, but not necessarily best for every parent!
Cheers, Tracey
A friend recommended your blog to me because I expressed an interest in home schooling. I have a 3rd grader, a 2nd grader, and a preschooler. I’m pretty much convinced I must be insane to take all this on. They have all been in public school since their first day of preschool. I was always overjoyed when summer break was over because there would be no more fighting. Here we are 4 weeks into the school year and I’m ready to pull them out now!
My 3rd grader came home Friday with her first math test. She made a 54 on it. I was not happy. After speaking with her teacher, I’m still not happy. The teacher’s explanation was “Third grade is so much different than 2nd”. This does not sit well with me, as I have to endure 3rd grade again next year!
So I have began my search. We have decided to keep them in public school for the rest of this year. We want to be certain this is what we want, that we can find the best curriculum for our children, and answer any other questions we have to try to eliminate stress.
Oddly enough, their dad is very supportive of the idea, even after I threw out the cost of different curriculum. We were both raised in public school, so this is completely new for both of us. I’m getting excited about it though
It is so encouraging to know that I am not alone in my fears of “What it” and my Momma-guilt of “What if it’s not enough?” My daughter just turned three, and we’ve talked about homeschooling from the beginning. But now that she’s three, I’m feeling the pressure to “teach” her. I have to remind myself to relax, and that I’ve already been teaching her for the last 3 years. Even so, somehow I feel the need to make it more formal and official now.
Growing up, I had friends who homeschooled, so even though I attended private school from kindergarten to graduation, I’ve always known the basics of homeschool and that you can be normal while learning at home.
We decided when my second child was starting first grade, that homeschooling him would be best. We could no longer afford paying for two kids to go to private school, and public school was not an option. We started with a DVD program for my second child, and kept my oldest in the private school by working at the afterschool program his school provided. I was able to take my younger kids with us, so for awhile it worked. After my fourth child was born, we moved 30 minutes away from the private school, and we weren’t coming home until 7 some nights. We decided it was no longer fair to the family that we put all of us through that for one child to attend private school. So we pulled my oldest out for his fifth grade year. It was a disaster.
I strongly believe that not everyone is made for homeschooling. While I totally support those who feel that is what God is leading, my oldest was not supposed to be homeschooled. This was reaffirmed when my husband was offered a promotion, and we could afford to send my oldest back to private school for his sixth grade year.
Fast forward to today, I have a seventh grader in private school, and homeschool a fourth grader, a second grader, and a kindergartner. We plan on giving all the kids the option to go to private school for middle & high school (if God provides the money), but if they want to stay home, we will do that, too.
Yes, we aren’t the typical homeschool or nothing family, but we do what’s best for each of our children on an individual basis with God’s help and guidance.
I loved reading this. We are starting our very first year of homeschooling and I am suddenly experiencing all of these doubts and fears. It’s funny because I was so excited and sure of homeschooling when we first made the decision earlier this year. And now everything is happening and it’s so real. Aaah! There’s also the doubts that other people have no problem expressing to you that get to me. But I have to remember that there is a reason why we were called to homeschool. It’s not always easy to follow the Lord but it’s the right thing to do and I know my family will be blessed because of it. I can already see it. As my son and I were doing school today I could see the joy in his eyes and I could tell that we were bonding. It is bringing us closer and I am so excited about that.
We played hard this summer. It was awesome! But because of that, as school-time approached I kind of got freaked out about being able to do it….this despite the fact that I’ve homeschooled for six straight years
Now that we are getting back into it, though, I forgot how much I love to watch my four children learn and grow and play together. It’s so wonderful! I am so glad we are homeschooling again.
Funny thing is, homeschooling is EASIER than public schooling. Definitely is. Don’t you think so?
@Karina: Our (only) daughter is 3, so we’re just beginning our homeschooling journey, and have no experience with public school. But how would you say it’s easier? Easier in terms of scheduling and not having to “deprogram” your kids from public school and deal with bullies and such? Seems to me like homeschooling is going to be harder because we have to put in the effort to plan lessons and such. We don’t just drop them off at the front door of the school and pick them up several hours later. I’d love to hear your perspective, because I’m a little afraid of how difficult homeschooling will be once we’re “really” homeschooling (doing curricula and such). Thanks!
@Holly: It wasn’t easier at first, but the reason it became easier (and I’m using the word easier loosely; it really means wonderful and pleasant) is because we pushed through the initial hard times. And the initial hard times I speak of came at different times along our journey; just not all at once, thanks heavens.
For instance, when my son was 6 and we weren’t getting along very well, of course I was tempted to send him off to school, but we stuck with it, we stuck with each other anyway, and we came out on the other side of those hard times just that much more bonded. It’s kind of like marriage IMHO. I remember at the end of that year with him thinking, I am so glad we stuck with each other and I didn’t send him off. To this day it saddens me when friends on fb post that they are “free” from their kids now that they are back in school. But even more than that, in the 6 years since that time that we weren’t getting along, we’ve never had another time like that since. He’s almost 12 now.
Or I think back to when my then 9-yr-old son was fighting with his then 4-yr-old little sister, surely I thought, Oh no, how am I going to handle sibling rivalry AND homeschool AND have another baby to boot?! But we stuck with it, we worked on how we treat each other, that siblings are BFF, that we are “Team Palmer,” and now my son comes home from judo and teaches his little sister moves he’s learned because he wants to be able to practice with her and she really wants to learn too (only because big brother thinks it’s so cool).
But I watch my four kiddos play together each day and learn together and there is so much less fighting between my kids than other kids. A grandma at the pool the other day commented to my son, “You are such a good big brother.” He was beaming. He looooves his three little sisters in a way that I am just sure he would not if he was gone all day at school.
So homeschooling is easier for a myriad of reasons: The outside influences and pressures from peers is significantly reduced. Our schedule is soooo much easier. We wake when we’re ready, we learn when we most jazzed and brain-on, sometimes we eat lunch at 12:30 but sometimes we eat at 2:00 because we are really into projects. I do preschool with my 3.5-yr-old on Tuesdays and sometimes we do it at 11:00 and sometimes we do it right after lunch. I don’t feel like I’m constantly running kids around town. I don’t go out in morning or evening traffic. We eat healthier because of it. I’ve heard from many people that public school is more expensive, ironically.
The harder parts for me are all mental: Making sure I schedule “me” time, especially because I get mentally taxed trying to make sure I am a good mentor to all four of my kids, trying to give them what they each individually need and want, reminding myself that I am good enough, loving what is…
I love the growth and progress I’ve made as a friend/wife/mother because of the deep introspection and relationship with God I’ve built in the process of homeschooling.
Each year we get into a groove that is different from the last year because of the kids’ new ages. Each year is different… and that makes it exciting (or nerve-wracking depending on how you look at it).
Perhaps for me the excitement of watching a 4-yr-old or 8-yr-old learn to read and LOVE it simply outweighs the hardness of it. Or when my son dives into learning how to train our new dog. Or teaching him entrepreneurship by running a lemonade stand. Watching the older kids reading to the younger ones has to be an all-time favorite of mine.
All I know is that after 6+ years of homeschooling, no matter how hard I am thinking it will be, the benefits of it far outweigh the hard parts. When I visit with friends who public school and I listen to how they feel about it, I get the sense that life is not peaceful and beautiful, that it’s harder for them.
Hope that helps.
The only two families that we had met before we made this decision were actually abusive, so you can imagine that our view of homeschooling was not a good one until we discovered that public school was not working out very well for our kindergartener, and changes needed to be made. We had to grow some really broad shoulders, because we were criticized by friends, family, and co workers. I’m glad that we stood our ground, because by the time the children in my daughter’s age group hit middle school, many of the naysayers were knocking on my door and buzzing my phone, asking what they needed to do in order to bring their children home.