We are switching gears a little with our Wednesday: Homeschool Question of the Week: This week, we are going to ask you a question. Well, not we….I am!
About a week ago, I was surfing around on Twitter….checking out the ‘trends’ and what’s going on in Twitter-land when I came upon a trend called: ”Dear Young Self”. It was a trend that allowed everyone across Twitter to ‘pretend’ to go back in time and share a bit of advice to their younger self. The responses were silly, serious, helpful and some were down right hilarious!
So, I started thinking…what would I say if I could go back; 5, 10, 15, 20, 25 years (I’m stopping there…not divulging much more about my age…hahaha!) and could say “DEAR YOUNG SELF, We need to chat about Homeschooling your children”. The thoughts that came into my head ranged from…..(can you guess?) silly, serious, helpful…and well, some were down right hilarious!
Many of you are new, many have been homeschooling for a few years…and many are well-experienced Homeschoolers and all of you have a ton of knowledge, wit and wisdom!
This week, we want YOU to leave a comment to your “Dear Young Self” about homeschool! What would you say if you could sit down and chat, tweet, post about, write a letter to, skype, text…..your younger self….about homeschool?
Rebecca is a Hip Homeschool Moms Senior Team Member and blogs at Mom’s Mustard Seeds
Number 1: Pray, pray, pray. Then pray.
:):)
Number 2: Do NOT try to emulate the failed state system in your home! Research, read, train yourself on what a quality education REALLY is, because it’s not what they tell you it is!
Number 3: Make time to go the the book discussion group on A Thomas Jefferson Education…because you’re going to wait to read that book until you are already 8 years into the process and it will save you SOOO much time, energy, searching, if you just read it NOW! Also read a Charlotte Mason Companion, and Cathy Duffy’s Top 100 Picks if it’s been published yet lol
Number 4: Don’t neglect your children’s mommy. Take care of her whole being, and they will be better off for it.
Number 5: Don’t neglect your children’s daddy. You are not too busy, it will all keep, and your man needs your loving honor. And your kids need to see that healthy relationship modeled for them, so make it a priority.
Number 6: Get off the computer and LIVE!
(I could go on and on…)
Wow, I love the books you mentioned. I stumbled upon the TJE book in the library one day…and it impacted me so much…more than I imagined it would. I love all of your comments to your ‘young self’!!!
Forget about what you will never do & focus on what God needs you to do. Sleep!!!! Don’t sacrafice your sleep for wasteful endeavors. Sleep 8 hours every night while you can. Read! Oh, & don’t loose it when the kids are little, take a deep breath & go look at your hair in the mirror, it will provide the needed laugh I am sure. When your mom tries to teach you to cook, let her. Oh, and when you grow up you may go to college & you may have a career; but chances are you will fall in love & you will have children, so learn how to be a wife & mother. I am certain I made it more difficult by not considering the possibility earlier in life. Your instincts will almost always be correct, listen. Love yourself, God does!
Jennifer, what sweet words of wisdom. I wish I had spent more time learning from my Mom in the kitchen! Thank you for sharing this!
Dear Young Self… Be patient. All will come right in the end.
Oh….yes!!! Love that last comment! All will come right in the end!
Dear Young Self,
We need to chat about homeschooling your children.
I’ve got one word for you: RELAX.
Your life will NOT go the way you planned it. Your family will encounter things you NEVER would have chosen.
But you will never, for one moment, be out of God’s hands. So relax.
(BTW, you’re gonna love the ride!)
Love, Me
Those words ring truth in my ears. I always marvel at others who are born relaxed in all situations! I wonder how they received that gift so early in life!
If I were to write a letter to my younger self that started out, “DEAR YOUNG SELF, We need to chat about Homeschooling your children,” it would be followed with
(I always thought that homeschoolers were weird, uneducated, sheltered…pick unflattering, over-used, unfair stereotype and insert here… I always said I would NEVER homeschool my children. Ha! 
)
“Never say never. Don’t be so hard on those homeschoolers…they will be YOUR children someday!”
Veronica, we had a homeschool family…two doors down. I never spoke to them. They were a bit younger than me…and it wasn’t because I didn’t want to…I didn’t know what to say…I didn’t understand. Now, it helps me understand others more! I love your genuine comment!
Take homeschooling seriously but when you are with your kids don’t act like it, they will have much more fun learning.
Ohh, your house will be a wreak most of the time, but you will be able to clean it up before anyone comes over.
KB…I LOVE your answer! I bet you have a very fun home!
Dear Young Self,
We need to have a chat about homeschooling. You already made the decision to walk this path, don’t stray. Don’t let the world at large talk you out of this, don’t let ‘studies show’ be the deciding factor. You are strong enough, you are smart enough, and you do love your kids enough to take them in hand, after all, you taught them all the important things before the first day of kindergarten. They are going to do something amazing every day, and you don’t want to miss it!
Love,
Older self
Sweet words of wisdom! Did you make up your mind to do it and then changed it? We did….and while I can’t undo that…I can move forward! Thanks!
I actually homeschooled my oldest for kindergarten, but encountered a series of very unfortunate events that led me to putting him into B&M at the beginning of the following year. Looking back, it probably was for the best for him, he had a stutter and the school provided speech therapy for him. I wouldn’t have known how to even begin to help him overcome that, and the group that he worked with was amazing. I now know that he could have gone to the school for the therapy while doing the rest of his education at home.
I’d say “Dear Self, I know you don’t see it now, because you’re very depressed and lonely, but there’s a lot of joy in the work that God has given you in this season of your life. Find the joy. It’s there, even in the boring, tedious tasks like folding laundry. Your Savior is bringing in some wonderful people into your life soon. That old hurt is going to go away. Until they get here, don’t waste so much time in doubt. Spend these quiet years building good habits and learning to lean on Jesus. Do your work more completely. Love your children more fully. Be more present. And for goodness sake, get some sunshine. There’s a whole world out there!”
Thanks, I really needed that right now. Depressed and lonely, my kids driving me crazy, forgetting why I’m doing this.
I’m saying a prayer for you right now. A tearful one. I know how bad it hurts to be lonely. If you don’t mind my offering some advice, do whatever you have to do to find a group of moms to lean on. Online is a good place to start! I know there have been time when there were no real life people available to me, but my online friends helped me through! And your Savior is going to do something to rescue you from your loneliness. I know He will. :0) Hang in there!
Lynda and Cindy,
Depression is such a hard thing to handle…I was there once and stay on my knees when I feel it creeping back into my life. I am praying for both of you and I am thankful for your sweet words and sharing with one another!
Wow its nice to hear someone else has felt like I do!! Thanks! I thought I was just being lazy and selfish! Even though in my heart I know its the right thing to do. Its lonely and I miss being with audlts sometimes.
It doesn’t have to be lonely! I’m not lonely anymore. There was a time when I was, though. It is very important to find other moms and keep in touch with friends and family weekly, if not daily. I know that if too much time goes by without doing something social (say, more than 10 days), I start to become very depressed. You need other grown-ups. That’s not selfish. It’s normal!
Of course, that’s not all about homeschooling, but really, I can’t find a difference between one thing I do for my kids and the next. Spelling, laundry, whatever. It’s all in the same mix!
OH, YOU Nailed it for me! YES! It all begins to run together as ONE when you homeschool…doesn’t it!
Dear young self..stop trying to do it ALL by yourself and perfectly!
What do you think almighty God is for?
Jacqueline….so true! My most difficult days are the ones where I try to do anything on my own!
Dear young self, You’re going to be greatly blessed with the opportunity to be with your children each and every day, building a bond that is amazing. This gift of time together, watching them grow and learn, will be exhilarating. Oh, and yes some days they’ll make you want to pull all of your hair out! But those hair pulling moments will be worth all of the other glorious moments you’ll experience together.
Jeannine…yes, there are some wonderful moments and clinging to those during the times where the hair pulling begins….I was just there yesterday! OY!
Dear Young Self,
We need to chat about you homeschooling your children. Yes, I KNOW you are an attorney and have a great career. (Or so you think at this point in your life) Yes, I know you live in “the best” neighborhood so your kids attend “the best” public school (how oxymoronic is that?) And YES, I know you never thought you’d be able to teach, but only assist with homework, assignments and volunteer at school. Well, ramp that up to all the time, everyday and twice on Sundays and that is what your life will look like here 17 years into the future. And, those two youngest kids? They have NEVER seen the inside of a public school and at 8 and 5 can tangle with the best and the brightest anywhere. That oldest one, you know, he’s just about to start kindergarten in “your time. Well, he’s 17 now, and he just spent the summer winning a national competition in playwriting, traveling as a delegate to the World Scout Jamboree in Sweden and is now ready to sit for the SAT’s in October and head off to college next fall. Imagine if you hadn’t waited until 7th grade to start homeschooling him! LOL! That 2nd oldest…he was just inducted into the National Boy Scout of America Honor Society. And that 3rd one, he’s a gifted pianist, song writer and reads 500+ page books EVERY week. So, young self, don’t fight against it. Don’t tell your husband he must have fallen and hit his head for suggesting that homeschooling is best for your family. Don’t say it can’t possibly work. Look forward to the fact that right along side homeschooling you’ve cultivated a niche market as an attorney that lets you work from home, set your own schedule and make a WHOLE lot more money than you were making when you had that “good job” and lived in that “best” suburb and sent your kids to that “best” public school! (Again…can’t get over the oxymoron! LOL) So thank GOD, young self, for the foresight and vision that He gave your husband for your family….and ENJOY THE RIDE!!!
Lovingly,
Older Self….a happily homeschooling mom!
Dear Young Self,
We need to chat about homeschooling your children. First of all.. DO IT. Don’t send them off to school because your family may condemn you. Do what you know to be right.
Once you begin homeschooling, do not try to emulate school in your home. You will fail miserably. Don’t fall into radical unschooling. The kids will resent you. One extreme or the other will cause you to feel like a failure. Ya know what? There was this woman in the 19th century who had the most beautiful, natural concepts of how to educate our children. Go read her writings. Her name was Charlotte Mason. All of your children… the bold, the shy, the ones with LD’s.. all of them will excel greatly using this method. And you know what’s best of all? YOU will enjoy it! You’ll look forward to each and every “School” day with anticipation. Your children will not want the lessons to end at the end of the day. And you get to spend tons of time in the outdoors! So ..go ahead.. do it this way so that your entire family will love homeschooling!
Don’t listen to others negativity! Follow your heart and what God is urging and calling you to do! “Train up your children in the way they should go!” You can do this! Who better qualified to know what your children need than you! YOU CAN DO THIS!! And remember you don’t need to answer to every skeptic in the world. You answer to GOD, your Husband, and your Children. If you can say you are doing what God is leading you to do and what you truly believe is Best for your family than you are doing what you are meant to do!
Dear Younger Self: I know you think that homeschooling is something done by fringe cooks on the edge of society, but one day soon you’re going to be one of those fringe cooks. Rather than being shocked and overwhelmed by the idea, begin learning about it now. Trust me. It’s not just a bunch of hippies thumbing their noses at society. Homeschoolers wear deodorant, too. Love, Me. P.S. There’s a really cute freckle-face in your near future. Wait for her. She’s worth it.
I would say, relax. It’s ok if the school day isn’t going as planned. Sometimes the kids aren’t cooperating and everyone just needs a break. And that is alright. It is better for everyone to walk away for a while or the rest of the day if need be than sit and be tense, frustrated, and learn to hate school. To me, that sounds a whole lot like public school. It took me too long to learn that. I have graduate two already, and I have two more to go. I would also say to do more hands on things. It is great to learn things from a book, but if you can, in any way, recreate or show the concept with a project that the kids can do… that is the way to go. They remember so much more that way. It is also ok if your house is dirty. It took me many years to realize that I could either be a good homeschool mom or I could have a consistently, tidy home. But, I could not have both. That is also, alright. It’s ok to get dirty when your learning (or playing), staying on schedule is overrated, dinner does not have to be served at 6pm, and going to the zoo totally counts as a school day.
Just a few of my musings…
This question inspired my latest post:
http://notthatgoodofaperson.blogspot.com/2011/08/waiting-for-girl-like-you.html?m=1
LOVED your post!
Thank you!
Dear Young Self,
Right now you are worried about teaching place- value, but one day you will be confindently teaching Calculus. It will all work out!
Enjoy your kids- what a gift it is to walk through life with them!